Valentine’s Day is just a day, it’s one day out of 365, it’s one day out of a lifetime. I’m not a huge fan of Valentine’s Day, I think a lot of people put too much pressure on it. We shouldn’t need a day to be reminded we are loved and we certainly don’t need a day to remind us we might be lonely. Frankly, other than the candy side of things, it comes up short, especially for adults. Like most holidays, I think there is certain aspects of it that makes it more magical for children/teens. The Valentine’s Day cards, the candy, the parties, and later the dances; it was cute and there was a certain level of excitement in the air. Valentine’s Day in the grown up world makes me feel less than warm and fuzzy.
If you are single, it is only another reminder that you aren’t living in a Meg Ryan film. What is even worse is you have to endure a month of commercials with the “happy couples”. Barf. If you are newly dating, it creates an awkward expectation of planning for a holiday meant for “I love you”. It is added pressure on the getting to know you phase. If you are attached then it’s a one up competition at the office, who got the big flowers or singing delivery. It also makes me cringe with every fiber for someone who tells horror stories of a clearly terrible/inconsiderate partner to gush over a $50 flower purchase. Like this one little (easy) act makes up for being a self-centered jerk the other 362 days of the year (I’ll give Jerky Joe Schmo birthdays and anniversaries too).
The point is it is just one day. Take a step back from it and ask yourself, “Does it matter the other 364 days?”:
- Do you really feel bad about being single, or are you having fun? If you truly feel you are missing out then put yourself in situations to meet people…try something new, join a meetup, try online dating, meet friends out more.
- If the new fling hasn’t asked you out yet, don’t get upset because he didn’t make plans for this one day. Does he make you feel special the other days, is he thoughtful with other plans and dates…then focus on those…it is just one day.
- Are you envious of the girl who got the big bouquet of flowers, do you know her story? Either way, it doesn’t matter. Are you happy in your other 364 days? Are you normally comparing your partner to her partner? Does your partner do things that make you feel special and show you are loved? Do you need a giant bear to know you are loved? I would rather have the other 364 days of kind, thoughtful acts then the largest public display in the office.
So, if you are feeling disappointed today, remember it is just one day. Take a step back and examine the other 364 days you have. If you can’t find something better than a giant stuffed bear…make a change.
For another take on Valentine’s Day, Kristina over at Damn Ten Pounds wrote a piece that had me saying “me too” for pretty much all of it…it is a much funnier V-Day take down 🙂
I totally agree with what you’re saying.
Thanks for stopping by Monique!
This is a refreshing way to look at V-Day! I feel the same way – we don’t overdo it in our home either. We spent last night with a home cooked steak in front of the TV watching movies together on the couch.
Steak is always as great way to celebrate!! Glad you had a relaxing V-Day and your Valentine made it home 😉
You’re right about it being just one day- but a little acknowledgement is nice too 🙂 My dad sent a sweet card and my sister texted this morning. Love is all around!
It is always nice to feel love and appreciated for sure Kate. Glad you are feeling the love!!! Have fun on your low-key date tonight! I think we will be couch lounging as well.
This was by far the best take on Valentine’s Day I’ve read so far. Much better than mine, I think 🙂 There’s a girl at my office who is married to the jerk you speak of. Of course she flaunts his once a year obligatory gift, turning her nose up at those of us whose husbands didn’t sign up for the workplace flower competition. And you know I’m rolling my eyes out of their sockets at that point. I’ll take the guy who’s nice to me year round, thanks. Regardless of our cynicism, I hope you and P have a wonderful day… and 364 more after that!
Well thank you Kristina! I did really enjoy your post…we will call it a tie then 🙂 queens of the anti-Valentine’s Day posts. We have nice dinners and drinks out on random Tuesdays. I guess we “celebrate” too often the rest of the year to get too worked up over one day. I hope you and Ryan have a wonderful day as well!!
Great post! I agree 100%. Especially the competition part. You hit the nail on the head! For some women (never guys) it seems to be the prefect opportunity to show off their “perfect” relationship. But you know what? I always feel that the harder someone tries to project that perfect life, the more they have to hide. I hate fakeness.
I have a hard time with people being fake…I’m not a “drink the kool-aid” type girl 🙂 I think it is sweet to celebrate but don’t judge others is they choose to opt-out or push it in other people’s face…I guess I’m that way about a lot of topics really 🙂
Love this post! It really is just another day. Who is to say that June 5th won’t be your special day. Just live life regardless of what’s going on around you and be the best person you can be always.
Thanks Angel! We celebrate all year long 😉
I agree it’s just another day! I’m happily married and like to enjoy and celebrate love all the time. Plus, the commercial crap that gets pushed on us (bears, processed chocolates) is a waste of money. And usually hideously ugly! I don’t bash others for celebrating, just don’t partake in it myself too much 🙂 Except for homemade cards or gifts.
I totally think it is fine if you choose to celebrate…I didn’t mean to come across bashing (if I did). I just think people get a little too caught up in it. For me, P does so many wonderful and thoughtful things every day that I don’t feel like we need to waste money or participate in a forced holiday. BTW…where have you been missy..missing your posts!
oh no, you didn’t come across as bashing at all! Thanks for checking on me 🙂 I’ve been taking a break, trying to figure out my blog focus. I feel like I’ve gotten a bit off track. I’ll be back soon, hopefully with a bit more regularity! haha
i don’t celebrate vday either. i don’t hate on it but i think it’s a made up holiday for companies to suck more money out of you and i’m all about sticking it to the man so i refuse to spend more money than i have to.
-kathy
Vodka and Soda
I totally agree, I feel that it is a very made up holiday and it seems very forced to me. Right there with you, I’m an extremely practical kind of girl…so I don’t like anything that seems like a waste of money.